Home  ›  Roll Your Eyes Again Voice Memes to Check Your Girl

Roll Your Eyes Again Voice Memes to Check Your Girl

Written By Tuesday 17 May 2022 Add Comment Edit
(iStock)

They say sarcasm shows weakness, but who gives a crap what they call back?! While some may think that sarcasm is a slippery slope, others believe that sarcasm is actually a sign of intellect. Later all, it was Oscar Wilde who wrote, "Sarcasm is the lowest form of wit but the highest form of intelligence."

See? Us sarcastic people, we're freakin' smart! In all seriousness though, there's even some scientific merit to such claims. 1 study from 2015, covered by Scientific American, plant that sarcasm tin actually increase inventiveness catamenia. Think about it: Sarcasm doesn't come from nowhere. Yous have to be pretty crafty and clever to whip upwards a sarcastic comment on the spot. In some ways, sarcasm is creativity. It might even spark inventiveness in other means, too!

Tread carefully though—on the other end of the spectrum, many therapists warn that sarcasm could significantly impair relationships. So, while flexing our sarcastic muscles may be good for our hereafter creative projects and IQs, also much sarcasm could find yous in dangerous territory with your loved ones.

Willing to accept the risk? Here are 200 of the all-time sarcastic quotes and sayings.

200 Sarcastic Quotes

1."When people enquire me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark."

2."I'm not saying I hate you, what I'm saying is that y'all are literally the Mon of my life."

three."Silence is golden. Duct tape is silvery."

four."I am busy right now, can I ignore you some other time?

v."Find your patience before I lose mine."

half dozen."Information technology's okay if you don't similar me. Not anybody has practiced taste."

7. "Do you call up God gets stoned? I think so… wait at the platypus."Robin Williams, Actor

8. "Light travels faster than sound. This is why some people appear bright until they speak." Steven Wright

9."If you observe me offensive. Then I suggest you lot quit finding me."

ten. "Sarcasm is the body'southward natural defense against stupidity."

11."I dear sarcasm. It's like punching people in the confront but with words."

12. "Life'due south good, you should get ane."

13. "Abolish my subscription because I don't demand your issues."

14."I clapped because it's finished, not considering I similar it."

fifteen."If had a dollar for every smart thing you lot say. I'll be poor."

Related: 101 Funny Quotes

16."I'g sorry while you were talking I was trying to figure where the hell you got the idea I cared."

17. "No, yous don't accept to repeat yourself. I was ignoring y'all the first time."

18."Sarcasm is the secret language that everyone uses when they want to say something mean to your face."

19."Unless your name is Google stop interim like you know everything."

twenty. "You know the divergence between a tornado and divorce in the Southward? Nothing! Someone'southward losing a trailer, number i." Robin Williams, Actor

21."I don't accept the energy to pretend to like you today."

22."I'k sorry I hurt your feelings when I called yous stupid. I really thought you already knew."

23."Don't worry about what people think. They don't do it very ofttimes."

24."If at outset, you lot don't succeed, skydiving is not for yous."

25."People say that laughter is the best medicine… your confront must be curing the earth."

26."I never forget a confront, only in your case, I'll be glad to make an exception."

27."Sarcasm–the ability to insult idiots without them realizing it."

28."If you lot think nobody cares if you're alive, try missing a couple of car payments."

29."My imaginary friend says that you need a therapist."

thirty."Well at least your mom thinks you're pretty."

31."Sometimes I demand what simply yous tin provide: your absence." Ashleigh Vivid

32."Just considering I don't care doesn't mean I don't understand."

33. "Why practise they call it rush hour when zero moves?" Robin Williams, Role player

34."My neighbor's diary says that I have boundary issues."

35."I would similar to apologize to anyone I have not offended still. Please exist patient. I will get to you shortly."

36."When I ask for directions, please don't use words like 'East.'"

37."Sometimes the amount of self-control it takes to not say what's on my mind is so immense, I demand a nap afterward."

38."The stuff y'all heard near me is a lie. I'one thousand way worse."

39."Me pretending to listen should be plenty for you."

40."Sometimes I wish I were a nicer person, only so I laugh and continue my twenty-four hour period."

41."I've birthed an entire infant in less fourth dimension than it takes my husband to poop."

42."Right earlier I dice I'yard going to consume a bag of popcorn kernels to make the cremation a flake more interesting."

43.""If you're waiting for me to give a crap, you better pack a lunch. It's going to exist while."

44."Wedlock. Considering your crappy day doesn't take to end at piece of work."

45."Sometimes I wish I was an octopus so I could slap eight people at once."

46."How much better would it be if a liar's pants really did take hold of on fire?"

47."What doesn't kill you gives you a gear up of unhealthy coping mechanisms and a dark sense of humor."

48."You lot'd exist in good shape… if you lot ran as much as your mouth."

49."Fun fact: Booze increases the size of the 'send' push by 89%."

l."I don't go crazy. I am crazy. I go normal from time to fourth dimension."

Related: 100 Great Comebacks

51. "I don't go along secrets, I just proceed people out of my business concern."

52."Exist the reason someone smiles today… Or the reason someone drinks. Whatever works."

53."I don't have a welcome mat at my door because I'm non a liar."

54. "Ugliness can exist fixed, stupidity is forever."

55."I'll go over it. I but need to be dramatic start."

56."Atomic number 82 me not into temptation. I know the way."

57."Hell hath no fury like your child catching you throwing ANYTHING away EVER. I snuggle out broken crayons similar a Mexican druglord."

58."Pitiful for existence late. I got defenseless up enjoying my last few minutes of non existence here."

59."Zombies consume brains. You're condom."

lx."My silence doesn't hateful I hold with you. It's just that your level of ignorance has rendered me speechless."

61."You're everything I want in someone I don't want anymore."

62."If they act similar they can live without you… Assist them practise it."

63."Shut your oral fissure when you're talking to me."

64."Sometimes I come across people and experience bad for their dog."

65."Certain I'll assistance yous out… the aforementioned fashion you lot came in."

66. "You lot play the victim. I'll play the disinterested bystander."

67."Never mistake my silence for weakness. Nobody plans a murder out loud."

68."My neighbors listen to proficient music whether they like it or not."

69."Sometimes I want to get dorsum in time and punch myself in the face."

70."I'm not crazy! The voices tell me I am entirely sane."

71."I'll endeavour beingness nicer, if yous endeavour existence smarter."

72."I was asked what I look for in a human relationship. Patently 'a way out' wasn't the right answer."

73."Friendships must be built on a solid foundation of alcohol, sarcasm, inappropriateness, and shenanigans."

74."Tact is for people who aren't witty enough to use sarcasm."

75."My boss said I intimidate my co-workers. I stared at him until he apologized."

76."Just burned 2,000 calories. That's the last time I leave brownies in the oven while I nap."

77."It'south amazing how clean my house can get when I'm pissed off."

78."Instead of 'single' as a marital status they should accept 'independently owned and operated.'"

79."I don't fall asleep. I overthink myself into a coma."

fourscore."If karma doesn't hit you lot, I gladly will."

81."Instead of 'have a nice day,' I remember I'll start saying, 'have the 24-hour interval you deserve.' Y'all know, let karma sort things out."

82."My favorite party trick is non going."

83."The older I get the less surprised I think I'd exist if a random body part just barbarous off one day."

84."I'd concord with you but so we'd both be wrong."

85."Marry me and I'll never look at another equus caballus!" Groucho Marx

86."Why do we spend so much time looking for intelligent life on other planets? I'd be happy to find intelligent life here on Earth first."

87."Keep rolling your eyes. Maybe you'll observe a brain back in that location."

88."People recall I go out of my manner to piss them off. Trust me, it's not out of my way at all."

89."So many people worry about their physical advent and material possessions, that they completely disregard their crappy personality."

90."Think I am sarcastic? Lookout me pretend to care!"

91."Some people really suck. Avoid them."

92."Sorry… to have met you."

93."If ignorance is bliss, yous must be the happiest person on this planet."

94."Dorsum in my day, people used to take photos with other people in them."

95."My friends are so much cooler than yours. They're invisible."

96."My circle is so small, I almost cut myself off."

97."In that location's no reason to tailgate me when I'm doing 50 in a 35. And those flashing lights on top of your auto expect ridiculous."

98."During labor, the pain is so corking that a woman can most imagine what a man feels like when he has a fever."

99."Y'all're giving me the silent treatment? Finally."

100. "Marriage is a romance in which the heroine dies in the first chapter." Cecilia Egan

101."I wish I could lose weight as easily as I lose my central, pen, prison cell telephone, temper, and even my heed."

102."Yeah, I'g a pacifist. I'm near to pass a fist beyond your face."

103."If it looks like I give a damn, please tell me. I don't desire to give off the wrong impression."

104."Autocorrect still thinks I want to say 'duck' 12 times a day."

105."If y'all wrote downward every unmarried thought you ever had you would get an laurels for the shortest story always."

106."Love is a burn. Just whether it is going to warm your hearth or burn down your house, you tin never tell." Joan Crawford

Parade Daily

107. "Like good vino, spousal relationship gets amend with historic period – one time y'all learn to keep a cork in it." Cistron Perret

108. "I was married by a estimate. I should accept asked for a jury."Groucho Marx

109. "I sometimes think that God in creating human being somewhat overestimated his power." Oscar Wilde

110. "When a man steals your wife at that place is no better revenge than to let him keep her." Sacha Guitry

111. "Nice perfume. Must you marinate in it?"

112. "In that location are 2 theories to arguing with women. Neither ane works." Will Rogers

113. "Marriage has no guarantees. If that'due south what you lot're looking for, go live with a car battery." Erma Bombeck

114. "This is what happened in love. One of yous cried a lot and and then both of you grew sarcastic." Lorrie Moore

115. "Ninety-nine per centum of lawyers give the rest a bad name." Steven Wright

116. "I am in full possession of the amazing power of beingness sarcastic." Sarah Rees Brennan

117. "Everybody knows how to raise children, except the people who have them." P. J. O'Rourke

118."If life gives you lemons, then exist thankful for it. I have been getting only the peels for equally long as I can remember!"

119."I don't know how people can imitation whole relationships. I tin can't even imitation a hi to somebody I don't like."

120. "Matrimony is the chief cause of divorce." Groucho Marx

121."The whiskey tastes like I'm about to tell you how I really experience."

122."I became insane with long periods intervals of horrible sanity."Edgar Allen Poe, Writer

123."I either take my hair and makeup done or await homeless. There is no in between."

124."Didn't slumber much but I did go a solid few hours of worrying done."

125. "We always hold hands. If I let get, she shops."Henny Youngman

126. "I never knew what real happiness was until I got married. And by then information technology was too late." Max Kauffmann

127. "No, no, no. I'm not insulting you. I'm only describing you."

128."Your fervent, misguided sense of entitlement is stunning."

129."I take neither the fourth dimension nor the crayons to explain this to you."

130. "You're not that lucky and I'g not that drastic!" Anonymous

131."You suck. You should prepare that."

132. "The simply time a woman really succeeds in changing a man is when he's a babe." Natalie Wood, Actress

133."Sweating while y'all shop counts as exercise."

134. "Union is a wonderful institution, merely who wants to live in an institution?" Groucho Marx

135."My tolerance for idiots is extremely low today. I used to have some immunity built upward, but obviously at that place is a new strain out there."

136."Understimate me. That will be fun."

137. "If you don't want a sarcastic respond, and so don't ask a stupid question."

138."I love being me. It pisses off all the correct people."

139."When life gives y'all lemons, squeeze them in peoples' eyes."

140. "If you're too open-minded, your brains will fall out." Lawrence Ferlinghetti

141."Apparently rock lesser has a basement."

142."Someday, y'all'll go far. I promise you stay at that place."

143. "Marriage is a elation for people who aren't in information technology."

145."I ever acquit a pocketknife in my purse. You know, in instance of a cheesecake or something."

146."You couldn't handle me even if I came with instructions."

147."I'k not always rude and sarcastic. Sometimes I'm asleep."

148."My alone time is sometimes for your safety."

149. "When people ask me stupid questions, it is my legal obligation to give a sarcastic remark."

150."It's ok if y'all disagree with me. I can't force yous to be right."

151. "People demand to start appreciating the attempt I put in to not be a serial killer."

152."You were my cup of tea, just I drink champagne now."

153."Life is curt. Grin while y'all still have teeth."

154."Oops! Did I just coil my eyes out loud?"

155."I need to teach my facial expressions how to use inside their phonation."

156."Have some fun with your life. Call in sick to places yous don't fifty-fifty work at."

157. "I may be drunk, Miss, merely in the morning I volition exist sober and you will nevertheless be ugly." Sir Winston Churchill

158."Tuesday is Monday's ugly sis."

159. "If you've never met the devil in the road of life, information technology's because yous're both heading in the same direction." Bearding

160."My life is just a series of awkward and humiliating moments separated by snacks."

161. "There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage." James Holt McGavran

162."My dominate told me to have a good day so I went home."

163."After Monday and Tuesday even the calendar says WTF."

164."Mutual sense is like deodorant. The people who demand it most never use it."

165. "I've had bad luck with both my wives. The first one left me and the second one didn't." Patrick Murray

166."I'm starting to think my purpose in life is to serve as a cautionary tale to others."

167. "This identify is so weird that the cockroaches have moved next door." Bearding

168."I'm actually non funny, I'chiliad merely mean and people recall I'm joking."

169."What's a queen without her king? Well, historically speaking, more powerful."

170. "Spousal relationship is requite and take. You'd better give it to her or she'll accept it anyway." Joey Adams

171."There's someone for everyone and that person for you is a psychiatrist."

172."I like sleeping because information technology's similar being dead without the commitment."

173."Not a unmarried i of my multiple personalities like y'all."

174. "I'll ever cherish the original misconception I had of you." Anonymous

175."If someone asks, 'Are you crazy?' Simply reply, 'Yes.' Blast. End of give-and-take."

176. "Patience: What you have when there are too many witnesses."

177. "I'm distressing, I don't have orders. I barely accept suggestions."

178."Don't confuse a smile with someone baring teeth."

179. "I beloved deadlines, I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by."Anonymous

180."We all know someone who speaks fluent crap."

181."Be happy. It drives people crazy."

182."They say ignorance is bliss but I find yours rather agonizing."

183."Sometimes the commencement stride toward forgiveness is realizing the other person was born an idiot."

184."Existence an developed is looking both ways before you cross the street and getting hit past an airplane."

185. "Y'all can be whatever yous want; nevertheless, in your case you should probably aim low."Anonymous

186."I am not lazy. I am on energy saving mode."

187. "It might look similar I'thou doing zero, but at the cellular level I'thou actually quite busy." Anonymous

188."I am currently under construction. Thank you for your patience."

189."Whenever I get running, I meet new people… like paramedics."

190."I lost your number. I lost it when I hit 'delete.'"

191."For Halloween, I'thousand going to exist emotionally stable. No 1 is going to know it'south me."

192. "Time is the best teacher; Unfortunately it kills all its students!" Robin Williams, Role player

193."I wish more than people were fluent in silence."

194."I plant your nose. It was in my business."

195. "Life is like a roller coaster, and I'one thousand most to throw up." Anonymous

196."Life is full of disappointments and I just added you lot to the list."

197."I'one thousand not a hot mess. I'm a spicy disaster."

198. "They say good things accept time… That's why I'thousand always late."

199. "Why would someone who has an average life expectancy of 75 years, become married when he is 29?" Anonymous

200. "Oh, yous hate your job? Why didn't you say and then? There's a back up group for that. It'due south called EVERYBODY, and they meet at the bar." Drew Carey, Comedian

Desire more great quotes? Check out…
100 Nuptials and Marriage Quotes
50 Thinking of Yous Quotes
50 Friday Quotes
50 Monday Motivation Quotes

moosesearpon.blogspot.com

Source: https://parade.com/1079501/stephanieosmanski/sarcastic-quotes/

0 Response to "Roll Your Eyes Again Voice Memes to Check Your Girl"

Post a Comment

Subscribe to: Post Comments (Atom)

Iklan Atas Artikel

Iklan Tengah Artikel 1

Iklan Tengah Artikel 2

Iklan Bawah Artikel